June 7 ♥ Loss: Saved by Heartstrings into Infinity

I lost a very good friend last week. We both knew it was coming, and yet… I was still surprised when it finally happened. I kept expecting some sort of miracle, just for her. Because we clicked instantly when we first met. Because she really understood me, and I got her. Because we truly were kindred spirits brought together by a shared experience. And, I needed her to ground me. But that’s not the way life works. Sometimes it just sucks. So, how do you say goodbye to someone so special? How do you let go of something so precious? Here are some things I am finding helpful. Allowing myself to recognize my feelings, cry when I need to, and laugh at our past antics. My emotions are running the gamut. And I am allowing them to do so. Being gentle with myself and allowing others to offer comfort to fill the void I feel. Letting go of any would-a, could-a, should-a’s. Regret will not change anything in the past. Our time together was what it was. Recalling the important things she taught me, especially spirituality and her favorite mantra: Spirit: teach me, show me, guide me. Seeking the lesson in all of this, and although it alludes me right now, I’m certain it will become evident, eventually. Most importantly I recognize that even though she no longer has a physical presence in my life, she will live on in my thoughts, words, and actions. These are the heartstrings that tie me … Continue reading

Dec. 27 ♥ Celebrate and Complete 2016

So many people have looked upon 2016 as the worst year, ever. And yet… There have been really good times, right? This is the time of year when many of us hunker down, stay close to the fire and wait for the wintry blasts to end. And yet… We want to feel hopeful for the bright New Year. I’m recommending that we all — me included — take some time for reflection on this past year, taking stock of what occurred in our lives. It’s really important to find the gifts, lessons, challenges and blessings from the year that is ending. In this way we can truly celebrate what has come before and release whatever needs to be so we can start fresh with clarity as our New Year arrives. Along this lifetime path of discovery you will come to deeply know yourself, grow in wisdom, and rejoice in sharing your own, unique gifts, which the world sorely needs. You need to review this past year to recognize it happened to you for a reason. You may totally understand that or maybe the meaning is hidden in a cloudy mist right now. Either way, it’s OK. What’s important is the process of introspection and celebration that will help you clear the debris so that beautiful, gorgeous you can make room for the new possibilities that will be coming in your New Year. And so, I am offering a gift to help you examine this past year and set your intentions for … Continue reading

Oct. 25 ♥ Apologize, But Not Too Much

I’m sorry. Oops, sorry. I’m sooooo sorry. Sometimes we use these phrases to avoid conflict and offset potential anger: “I’m sorry to bother you but…”. We think this helps keep the peace and ensures that people will continue to like us when this actually creates an imbalance in our relationships because we are putting ourselves in a submissive position. Or maybe we’re so eager to foster cooperation and community that we apologize just so we can move on. What we’re really saying is that our honesty takes a back seat to getting along. The common denominator here is that we’re giving away our power, freely and willingly. When we apologize inappropriately the implicit message is that there’s something wrong with us and that we don’t know what we need. We somehow don’t measure up. When we do this often enough it becomes our truth. So what’s the remedy? We need to say what we mean, without apology. Instead of “I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you”, try, “Would you repeat that, please?” Feel the difference? We need to apologize only when it is necessary. Like when we hurt or disappoint someone. And we need to stop using “sorry” as conversational filler or when we have no control over what happened. There are great gifts waiting when we stop over-apologizing: improved self-respect and self-awareness, and more honest relationships with others.   Now It’s Your Turn Pay attention to how often you apologize and stop and reflect on why you’ve said, “I’m sorry” … Continue reading

Don’t Be Afraid to Try

Don’t be afraid to try, because you never look back on life and smile at what you could have attempted. Joy only brightens your countenance over those things you did attempt. ~ Richelle E. Goodrich   I met my Inner Critic up close and personal recently but this time I dealt with him in an entirely different way. Here’s the story. Since moving to New Mexico, I’ve had this creative itch. Maybe it’s the beautiful environment. It might be the ready availability and celebration of art everywhere. I’m not sure where the urge has come from but I’m grateful it’s appeared. And this time I’m choosing not to tamp it down. A few months ago I came across an announcement about a beginners watercolor class. So I registered. Totally spontaneous response. Something in my gut said, “Go for it!” Then I got the materials list. Wow! Tons of stuff to buy. Lots of technical jargon. So many unknowns. Those thoughts awakened my Inner Critic’s attention. “Hello…why are you spending money on stuff you’ll just end up throwing away? What makes you think you have any talent? How do you know you’ll be any good? You know you’re gonna be sitting in a class where everyone else has much more experience than you!” You get the idea. But this time I fought back. I really wanted to take this class. Just for the heck of it. So I reminded myself that the course was for beginners, not professional artists. 1 point for me, 0 … Continue reading

Risk Be Damned

It’s s-p-r-i-n-g!! Around here it was cold, cold, cold and then quite suddenly warm. The daffodils appeared overnight. The robins and cardinals and house finches began singing their hearts out, proudly announcing their return. And the trees, all in glorious bloom, have added a Monet-like touch to the scenery. <a-choooo> It’s as if Mother Nature could no longer hold in all of her stored energy and things just had to come busting out. And yet, there’s a risk involved here. There’s no guarantee that winter is truly over. We’ve occasionally had an icy blast from the north bringing inches and inches of snow, cutting short the riotous emergence and sending the humans back indoors. And yet, every year the cycle repeats unfailingly. Mother Nature will not be thwarted! She takes her chances, knowing that sometimes the magic will be interrupted. Spring will come. Risk be damned.   And then the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk to bloom ~Anais Nin   Your Call to Action: What lessons are here for you? Take a closer look at your tight bud—what’s inside? What must you believe to be more Mother Nature-like? Who must you be so that you can say, “Risk be damned” and gloriously bloom?   … Continue reading