Sept. 28 ♥ Do One Thing Every Day that Scares You

Why would anyone willingly do something that scares them? I can think of many reasons. Being scared certainly pushes you out of your comfort zone. Gets that adrenaline flowing. Wakes you from your lethargy. Puts some oomph in your day. It makes you feel alive. What if you were given the opportunity to do something scary? Would you respond with a “Yes, but…I like my life as it is. Why shake things up? I don’t have time; this is crazy; I can’t. I need a guarantee…” Ah, hello, fear! If you believe something is fearful, then it is – funny how that works. But that also makes the opposite true: believing you can overcome your fear makes things less scary! What if you broke out of the same-old, same-old and pushed your limits? What if you told your fears that you’re in charge and ready to step outside your comfort zone? There are many gifts here, with your name written on them in large, sparkly letters: I can do things I didn’t think possible! I am so proud of myself! I live life big! I can deal with fear! Don’t keep these gifts waiting. The party won’t last forever. Grab the chance to design your life the way you want it. All because you left your comfort zone!   Now It’s Your Turn What have you put off trying because fear got in the way? What small step could you take toward your fear? Who could you tap to support … Continue reading

December 16 ♥ Overcoming Uncertainty on the “Ice” of LIfe

Last week I had the opportunity to check off something from my bucket list: I went ice skating at Rockefeller Center. And the amazing thing is that I didn’t even know this belonged on my bucket list! The opportunity presented itself, and I thought, “Why not? Go for it, girl!” When the time came, I eagerly laced up my skates, ready to get out there. And as I stepped on the ice I realized how slippery it was, with the very real possibility that I would fall. My years of skating as a kid were in the very distant past and my knees began to wobble in trepidation. I grabbed for the security of the rink’s wall hanging on as if my life depended on it. Maybe this wasn’t such a great idea after all. And then I consciously decided I was not going to be a bystander and let the swirl of skaters pass me by. I needed to get out there, if only to test my mettle! I took a leap of faith and risked letting go to see what would happen. Gingerly I began to glide, amazing myself at how my skating skills came back to me. I was filled with wonder and pride and exuberance. I could do this! Nearly 90 minutes later I congratulated myself on my courage and ability to step up to the challenge. I had overcome my fear and discovered the joy of personal achievement. This story is the perfect analogy for … Continue reading

“What If”, Be Damned

It ain’t no use putting up your umbrella till it rains. ~ Alice Caldwell Rice   I received some medical news this week that may or may not be a problem. I won’t have more facts until next week. I’ve been observing myself since I received that phone call. My first reaction was omg. And I fully felt the weight of what might be. I was rattled and unable to focus for the rest of the day. But as the week progressed, I noticed that my initial reaction had lessened. And while the bad news idea is still in the back of my head, I have chosen to not worry until I have a reason to. Why the change? For one thing, I have come to believe that worrying about what might be in the future takes away from my being in the moment, right now. And, I’m not willing to give up the “right now” for ruminations on the past or concern about the future. I also believe that the future is out of my hands. I’ve got too much living to do right now to spend my energy on “what if.” How did I get here? I come from a long line of worriers. Stories abound about how much time my relatives spent consumed by “what if.” Most of them were products of the 1st Great Depression, so perhaps that attitude is understandable. But… I saw what that did to them and how heaps of energy were squandered, … Continue reading

Hello, Self. I Love You.

It’s not worth our while to let our imperfections disturb us always.” ― Henry David Thoreau Imperfections? We all have ‘em. Yup. This is true of celebrities, leaders, our friends and family members. Even George Clooney has imperfections—although I think I might be hard-pressed to list many for him. Oops… back on message. Everyone has imperfections. Some of us complain that our hips are too broad. Or we want a bigger or smaller bra size. We’ve got wrinkles, thick waists, or no athletic ability. We’re afraid to speak in public or we chatter on endlessly because we’re nervous. Oh, yeah. We get hung up on “If only I was… “ and sigh longingly. We concentrate on what we lack, seeing only our faults. We’re so hard on ourselves. Bottom line: fear is driving us. We’re afraid that we’re inadequate, believing that people won’t like us for who really are. So we beat up on ourselves because we’ve convinced ourselves that we are somehow lacking—as compared to others. And just who’s keeping this master scorecard? As Walt Kelly, creator of the Pogo cartoon strip, says, “We have met the enemy, and he is us.” We’re the ones doing this to ourselves. Granted, the media and TV ads make it extremely easy to fall into this trap. And we so willingly listen, feeding our dissatisfaction of who we are right now! But if we choose to listen, we can also choose to ignore. There’s power in that statement! A friend offered a … Continue reading

FEAR: an Invitation to No Regrets

“If you don’t have fear in your life somewhere, you’re going to have regret later on.” ~ Surfer Magazine, Sept., 2012 I know I often write about dealing with the fears that crop up in our lives. And I usually come from the standpoint that we not let fear stand in our way. What’s interesting about this quote is that it is tied to regret. So often I suggest that fear is something to move beyond. That it’s a barrier to be overcome. But what if we look at it differently? What if we think about fear as a way to keep our juices flowing? As a mechanism to push us beyond what we think is possible? What if we come to believe that fear is a tool to minimize the regrets we will have at the end of our lives? I mean, who wants to be on their deathbed wallowing in, “I didn’t have the courage to…, If I hadn’t held myself back…, I really missed out on…If I had only realized…”? It’s the old “woulda, coulda, shoulda” dance. Boring. Predictable. Small. Fear helps us feel alive! (literally and figuratively) We are hardwired to be fearful. As primitive creatures on earth, we HAD to be this way because we might easily have died otherwise. We would have had no time for regret! Fortunately we no longer have saber-toothed tigers to face so we don’t need to be ever watchful. But here’s an important truth: nothing amazing will ever result in our lives, and regret will surely follow, if we allow our … Continue reading