Sept. 28 ♥ Do One Thing Every Day that Scares You

Why would anyone willingly do something that scares them? I can think of many reasons. Being scared certainly pushes you out of your comfort zone. Gets that adrenaline flowing. Wakes you from your lethargy. Puts some oomph in your day. It makes you feel alive. What if you were given the opportunity to do something scary? Would you respond with a “Yes, but…I like my life as it is. Why shake things up? I don’t have time; this is crazy; I can’t. I need a guarantee…” Ah, hello, fear! If you believe something is fearful, then it is – funny how that works. But that also makes the opposite true: believing you can overcome your fear makes things less scary! What if you broke out of the same-old, same-old and pushed your limits? What if you told your fears that you’re in charge and ready to step outside your comfort zone? There are many gifts here, with your name written on them in large, sparkly letters: I can do things I didn’t think possible! I am so proud of myself! I live life big! I can deal with fear! Don’t keep these gifts waiting. The party won’t last forever. Grab the chance to design your life the way you want it. All because you left your comfort zone!   Now It’s Your Turn What have you put off trying because fear got in the way? What small step could you take toward your fear? Who could you tap to support … Continue reading

Sept. 7 ♥ What’s Your Line in the Sand?

What do these sentences all have in common? Sorry, I can’t do that. I’m spread far too thin right now. I will not allow anyone to speak to me that way. I need some time to think about that. These are all statements honoring personal power. Each shows various ways of saying, “No!” firmly and politely. Every one indicates a personal boundary, stated in clear, honest language. Could you say these things when needed? It wasn’t so long ago that these types of statements were hard for me to use. I’d let people manipulate me. I was afraid of confrontation. I swallowed my true feelings. On the surface I looked and acted like a happy camper. But inside…well, I felt depleted, angry and resentful because I willingly sacrificed my serenity for the sake of keeping everyone happy and everything on an even keel—for others but not for me. I let others intimidate and overwhelm me, often bullying me into submission. I let others usurp my personal power. I’m not like that now. So, what changed? I came to realize that it was my responsibility to take care of me. I couldn’t rely on anyone else to do this for me, and more importantly, I didn’t have to have anyone’s approval to do so. I came to believe this but it took longer for me to put it into action. Slowly I came to understand that it was my job to protect my time and energy. I couldn’t be everything to … Continue reading

August 12 ♥ Add Patience to Your Vocabulary

Ah, patience, often looked upon as a virtue by others. But in my life, not exactly a vocabulary word…you probably can relate. Someone near and dear to me has a rapidly deteriorating hearing problem. You would think that I’d be sympathetic and understanding. I’d be patient.  Alas, I get frustrated very easily and when I repeat my words I do so with a tinge of frustration and a “what is wrong with you?!” attitude. How unkind. If the situation was reversed I would expect the speaker to accommodate me and not belittle my lack of recognition, my need for repetition. After all, it’s not something I can control. I am all too human, wanting everyone to fit into the neat little boxes I make up in my head. My expectations often get in the way of my showing patience, as in “I’ve just spoken, now reply, dammit!” <sigh> I recognize my failings with patience, and I accept that this is not who I really want to be. Now I just need to take action to improve this character defect. This week I’m going to step up to the challenge!   Now it’s your turn: Where do you show lack of patience? What are your triggers? How do your expectations play into your impatience? What would it look like to “act as if” you were patient in a particular situation? How might you try this new behavior the next time the situation appears? … Continue reading

Life Is Good and I Don’t Deserve It

Before you can win, you have to believe you are worthy. ~ Mike Ditka   I recently had a friend who was quite elated at the opportunities and success coming her way. She happily listed all of the possibilities in her professional life. And then she tagged on, “Until I have to pay the price.” Um, excuse me? Why would she assume that since her life was really humming that soon everything would take a downturn? Why would she jump to the conclusion that there’s a debt to be repaid? Her hidden dialogue probably went something like this: “ Life is good. My work is gaining recognition. Enjoy it now because it won’t last. And, I’m not worthy of having this happen again and again.” I know many of you can relate to this feeling. I’ve been there often enough myself. Somehow my friend had made up the story that there is an enormous balance scale kept in the ether, and that weighing down too heavily on one side of the scale would eventually cause an equal and opposite reaction in the other direction. Newton’s law of motion may apply in physics. It does not apply to what happens to us on our life’s journey! Here she was preparing herself for something that may never happen: her “good fortune” would fade away. Which also means that she was not fully enjoying her life right now. She was already worrying about the “what ifs” and the “debt” she was going to … Continue reading

Lady, Can You Spare a Smile?

Smile every chance you get. Not because life has been easy, perfect, or exactly as you had anticipated, but because you choose to be happy and grateful for all the good things you do have and all the problems you know you don’t have. ~ Mark and Angel Hack Life blog. When was the last time you smiled in gratitude? When you CONSCIOUSLY were grateful for things in your life? Seriously. How long has it been? Like my clients and me, you probably have been taking life a bit too seriously. I know I often lean toward the, “It’s all SO important” world view.And, I tend to concentrate on the negative and the things I don’t have. How about you? Be honest with yourself here. So, stop for a moment.  Ask yourself these questions: Are you living in poverty? Do you have easy access to running water? Do you often go to bed hungry? Do you have clothes to keep you warm in winter and cool in summer? Can you rely on electricity being available when you turn on a light? Etc., etc., etc. Uh-huh. Like me, your life’s probably not so bad with this perspective. It’s so easy to get sucked in to “poor ole me” thinking. Sure we’ve all got problems, and sometimes we don’t get what we want. But truly, how bad is it—really? I am consciously choosing to focus on what is going well for me in my life, the many bountiful riches.  Smilin’ and lovin’ every minute at what I DO … Continue reading