May 3 ♥ Keep or Toss? Change the Question…

I have been in this minimizing, clean-out mode for the past month. At first I would carefully consider every item: keep or toss? Seemed straightforward enough. Yet, somehow a “decide later” pile kept appearing. I wasn’t making the kind of progress I had envisioned. I kept plugging along, knowing that I really had to get rid of some things. So I gave away the clothes that were never, ever going to fit me again. I also got rid of all my professional work clothes. No longer had a need to wear them, so what possible purpose were they serving in my closet? And then I added those things that no longer support who I am right now. Adios to books on topics that had once interested me; books I would never read again. Farewell to old cards I had received, magazine articles I planned to read, shoes for special occasions that would never be repeated. Things associated with long-ago hobbies. Yarn that was never going to see the light of day as a garment. Good riddance to things I was “going to get to” once upon a time. Suddenly I have picked up momentum. I have become more ruthless in what I am discarding. And the more I have eliminated the more free and unencumbered I feel. There is more space in my home, and in my being. I am clearing out what no longer serves me or supports who I want to be in the world. I want my home to … Continue reading

Sept. 28 ♥ Do One Thing Every Day that Scares You

Why would anyone willingly do something that scares them? I can think of many reasons. Being scared certainly pushes you out of your comfort zone. Gets that adrenaline flowing. Wakes you from your lethargy. Puts some oomph in your day. It makes you feel alive. What if you were given the opportunity to do something scary? Would you respond with a “Yes, but…I like my life as it is. Why shake things up? I don’t have time; this is crazy; I can’t. I need a guarantee…” Ah, hello, fear! If you believe something is fearful, then it is – funny how that works. But that also makes the opposite true: believing you can overcome your fear makes things less scary! What if you broke out of the same-old, same-old and pushed your limits? What if you told your fears that you’re in charge and ready to step outside your comfort zone? There are many gifts here, with your name written on them in large, sparkly letters: I can do things I didn’t think possible! I am so proud of myself! I live life big! I can deal with fear! Don’t keep these gifts waiting. The party won’t last forever. Grab the chance to design your life the way you want it. All because you left your comfort zone!   Now It’s Your Turn What have you put off trying because fear got in the way? What small step could you take toward your fear? Who could you tap to support … Continue reading

May 25 ♥ What You Can Learn from Your Bad Habits

Ever have a negative situation that just keeps popping up, over and over? Maybe it’s the same argument with a loved one. Or always being late. Perhaps it’s spending too many extra hours at work. I’m sure you know what I mean. In all of these cases repetitive patterns just keep…well, repeating.  Why is that? These behaviors are bad habits, which get triggered by a specific event leading to some sort of reward. Yes a bad habit gets us something. And often we aren’t even aware of what we get in return. You know that same-old, same-old argument you keep having? What reward do you get for not resolving it once and for all? As for always being late? How does that serve you? And why are you really working late so often? You must be getting something in return or you wouldn’t act in any of these ways! Finding out the “why” behind your bad habits, and, of course, wanting them to be different, is the path to change. These bad habits have something to teach you about yourself, and you’ll stay on this merry-go-round until you learn the lesson waiting for you. Ready to jump off the ride? Now It’s Your Turn Identify one habit you’re ready to change and why you’d like to change it. What event triggers the habitual behavior and what reward do you get for acting this way? Look deep and hard for your current reward. The secret to making a change is to … Continue reading

May 11 ♥ Make Time to Do Something that Makes You Happy

Our lives can have so many “shoulds” and “have to’s”. Whether we work for someone else, work for ourselves, are retired or don’t work, there always seems to be something that must get done. I used to think that I had to complete all of these necessary things before I could take time for myself. The only problem with this kind of thinking is that more and more “shoulds” and “have to’s” kept appearing. Other people were always there with requests for help. It seemed that the faster I accomplished one thing; something rapidly took its place. And time for myself? Never happened. But what if we took today’s quote to heart? What if we made sure there was always enough time to do something that makes us happy, satisfied, even joyous? How would our lives be different? I’m not suggesting that we block a huge amount of time or spend a lot of money creating some sort of sanctuary for ourselves. That would be nice but it’s not necessary. I’m simply saying that we need to set aside time — surely you can spare 10 minutes — to do something that brings us joy or happiness, which sends a message to our brains that we are as important as all of the myriad things that must get done. It validates that we have a right to these feelings. And it creates space for our spirits to rejuvenate and breathe. I’m not relinquishing this activity. My contentedness, my sanity, and … Continue reading

April 27 ♥ What’s the Real Cost of Rushing?

I used to love rushing around, often in a frenzy. Zipping from one activity to another. Never time for a bathroom break, or a meal away from my desk, let alone a chance to catch my breath. I needed the adrenalin rush. The sense of importance I felt because everyone seemed to need me. I felt most alive while dashing everywhere. Yes, I admit I was addicted to moving at the speed of sound. But a breathless relationship with time didn’t allow moments for reflection, for creativity, or for just being in the moment. I began to change when I noticed that I have my most creative thoughts while taking a shower. Why? Because for me it’s a disrupter, causing me to disengage. I’m not focused on “how” to take a shower; I’m just doing it, on autopilot. Which allows my brain to relax and lets my subconscious come to the surface. And as I gave my subconscious more opportunities to “speak”, my creativity began to soar. And I discovered the wonder of my brain: that my subconscious has been doing the heavy lifting, behind the scenes. All I have to do is find a way to disengage and let the ideas rise to the surface. The important thing is to find a way to put your brain into a relaxed mode. Perhaps it’s washing dishes, vacuuming or folding laundry. All of these activities require little conscious thought, allowing us time to let our minds wander. And if we continue … Continue reading