Let’s Get Selfish!

“Don’t sacrifice yourself too much, because if you sacrifice too much there’s nothing else you can give and nobody will care for you.”

Karl Lagerfeld

I know that “selfish” is a loaded word for many of us. We perfected our nurturing side during our childhood years and taking care of others became our modus operandi. And, unfortunately, most of us learned that skill far too well.

When I ask women how they take of themselves I usually get a sheepish grin and a comment along the lines of, “Yes, I know I should but…” And the list of excuses begins ad nausea.

Enough “yes, buts” already!

Let’s learn a new meaning for the S-word. Let’s define selfish with its original meaning: care of self. aka self-cherishing. Note that this says nothing about self-care to the exclusion of all others.

So often we miss that fine detail.

You know how the airline pre-flight safety precaution states that you should administer oxygen to yourself first, before helping others? Same thing applies to YOUR LIFE.

If you run out of oxygen, if you are depleted of energy, centeredness, time, space,sleep, exercise, fun, and healthy food, how can you possibly have anything to give anyone else?

This may be a, “Well, duh!” moment for you, but, what are you DOING about it?

Think of yourself as a beautiful container that holds water, which you lovingly share with others. If you do not take time to replenish the water, you eventually will be unable to share this precious resource with others.

And, that’s not what you’re about. You want to be there for others. You want to be generous. You truly want to nurture.

Thinking only of yourself is just NOT in your nature. You really don’t know how to be “selfish” in the negative sense.

Keep in mind that the more water you have in your beautiful container, the better able you will be to satisfy others’ needs without compromising your own.

So, get over the idea that self-care somehow takes away from helping others. And you’ll reap the ultimate gift: you’ll be better equipped to make choices and take action from a place of sanity and centeredness.

Your Call to Action

Make a list of 25 ways you would love to nurture yourself. Pull out your calendar and schedule at least one a day for the coming two weeks. Then stand in front of your mirror and pledge that you will replenish yourself daily (even if the wash doesn’t get done!)



Let’s Get Selfish! — 8 Comments

  1. awesome message, Robin! Thanks so much for the reminder! I’m learning as I get older that little pleasures often are really what replenishment are all about. It doesn’t have to be a big thing to make a big difference!

    • I love your wisdom and insight! We NEED daily replenishment in order to deal with everything that comes our way.

  2. This was so good and something we unfortunately need to be continually reminded of! Thanks!

    • I know this is a hard one to remember. So how are you gonna keep the idea forefront in your mind

  3. Thank you Robin for continuing to post these tidbits…even though you are far away. I so look forward to them as I am moving through a new chapter in my life. Hope you are enjoying your new home! Take care!

    • Woo-hoo to you! Time for yourself is a GREAT way to get to know who you really are, deep, down inside.