I lost a very good friend last week. We both knew it was coming, and yet…
I was still surprised when it finally happened. I kept expecting some sort of miracle, just for her. Because we clicked instantly when we first met. Because she really understood me, and I got her. Because we truly were kindred spirits brought together by a shared experience. And, I needed her to ground me.
But that’s not the way life works. Sometimes it just sucks.
So, how do you say goodbye to someone so special? How do you let go of something so precious?
Here are some things I am finding helpful.
- Allowing myself to recognize my feelings, cry when I need to, and laugh at our past antics. My emotions are running the gamut. And I am allowing them to do so.
- Being gentle with myself and allowing others to offer comfort to fill the void I feel.
- Letting go of any would-a, could-a, should-a’s. Regret will not change anything in the past. Our time together was what it was.
- Recalling the important things she taught me, especially spirituality and her favorite mantra: Spirit: teach me, show me, guide me.
- Seeking the lesson in all of this, and although it alludes me right now, I’m certain it will become evident, eventually.
Most importantly I recognize that even though she no longer has a physical presence in my life, she will live on in my thoughts, words, and actions. These are the heartstrings that tie me to her. It is my way of celebrating and honoring our temporary, earthly connection.
I think that’s a most fitting memorial.
Now It’s Your Turn
Think of a loss you’ve had to deal with. What heartstrings into eternity did you discover? How was that an appropriate memorial for you?